Guest Blog from my friend John Williams: The Woman You Thought You Knew

THE WOMAN YOU THOUGHT YOU KNEW
by John Williams

A true story about real people written in the form of a short story

CAST OF CHARACTERS AND THE REAL PEOPLE THEY REPRESENT

Renee Folger—representing real person Jane the H. of blog entry "Dregs"
Ben Folger—representing real person Ron the H. of "Dregs"
Both influential leaders among Indianapolis "progressives" and "socialists"
Glen Fowler—representing real person George Fish
All long-time activists among Indianapolis "progressives" and "socialists"

Disclaimer: Although a story based on real people and real events, it is still a short story, and should not be taken as a completely true-to-life documentary; however, it is substantively based on the facts and psychologies of the personages as the author knew them, and he’s known each personage depicted for decades.

The story of Renee Folger needs to be told. Through this uncovering of her life, you’ll get to know her and the secrets that were found out. Many of these previously-unknown secrets were expressed only after her passing. Be on guard, read carefully and see what happened, lest it happen to you.

As the story begins, we learn that Renee’s husband, Ben, has a good-paying job in a local government office. He buys champagne and roses for Renee, and provides a good living. Renee rejoices in her husband’s good position, and provides support for him in any way she can. From a distance, it seems their life is good, and that the goodness will never stop.

Ironically, Renee was doing quite well herself financially. She was a nutritionist for a large hospital complex, and her decisions were final, no questions asked. Good money, authority over others, and a husband with a good-paying job. Wow! What else could she want?

For reasons unknown, Renee was the money handler for her family of two; the couple never had any children. As such, she wrote the checks, paid the bills, and made all the financial decisions. Her husband took the backseat completely. This was so obvious that some said the husband didn’t even know how to write a check, even a little one.

Renee needed control over everything, and she got it. She controlled the finances, and developed into what might be called a “helper.” Her life’s mission was to help others and make a beautiful, happy world where she and her friends could live.

But even in this make-believe world some problems seeped in. There was a political shift at work, and her husband’s job situation changed dramatically. Over time, he was maneuvered out of his job. He soon needed help, and Renee was more than happy to step in.

Renee and Ben were of the Quaker faith. Over the course of many years, they regularly attended church services and made many close friends. Renee, of course, was the center of attention, and soon her friends considered her a type of angel. She could do no wrong! She was the perfect example of goodness and correctness—or so it seemed on the surface. This surface appearance of goodness and correctness was so strong that, in fact, had she been a member of a different religion, she would have been up for canonization as a saint.

Ben, now unemployed, gained employment as a Quaker minister. Gee, imagine that! As time went on, the members of the congregation became unhappy with the new minister. It seems he wanted to take his faith-driven purpose in life to the streets. The higher-ups decided that Ben would have to go. Quite frankly, he wasn’t following the rules of Quaker orthodoxy, and was considered somewhat too radical for official purposes and decorum.

Being very close to Ben and his situation, naturally, Renee once again found another place where she could “help.” She did have friends and money, and Ben certainly had a need. Renee, however, didn’t look to Ben to decide what he wanted, but instead decided for Ben that he needed a new direction. Perhaps his message could be better expressed, and his mission better accomplished, as an editor and typesetter who also worked other ancillary journalistic occupations. At least, she thought, here he could have freedom of expression and perhaps make some money.

Next, we find Ben being the editor of a small political newspaper. The title of “editor” is used loosely here, as Ben was editor in name only. Renee knew the finances of the paper and, through knowing such, had control of what was published and by whom. Once again, her decisions were final and not to be disputed, even by Ben.

As time went on, Renee’s helpfulness found a new outlet. She embraced the less fortunate, those people on the street who needed direction and hope. Sometimes she blended politics and religion quite nicely, as they both fit together quite well. Or--at least it appeared that way!

Social issues abounded, and help was needed. Renee and Ben attended meetings and protests to add their input—and their impotence in matters of power to really effect change—to various causes. Dues were paid and contributions were forthcoming. A new cause, a new day. Renee was happy, prosperous, and boy, could she help!

But during this felicitous time something else happened. Something unexpected, something that would have a substantial effect on Renee and Ben for years to come: Glen Fowler entered their lives. He met Renee and Ben at one of the political meetings they attended. For whatever reason, there was an attraction by Glen to what seemed to be a very nice couple. Or so he thought!

Glen Fowler’s background was complex, troubled, and unknown to Renee and Ben. The experiences of his life that he revealed, however, fit in quite nicely into Renee’s notion of the type of person she could really help. Really help! And what did Glen really need? In a word, everything.

For too many years, Glen had been trapped by the circumstances of his life. As a youth, Glen had been forced to accept the dictates of his parents and family. He had no choice, no alternative, no recourse! His parents were members of an orthodox religion that was very authoritative, very authoritarian, and accepted no dissent or rebuttal. It was either “this way” or “the highway.”

The elements of this faith reinforced his parents’ view of child-rearing, which was also quite authoritarian. As Glen got older, conflicts arose within his family. Questions arose, and were not answered. He soon realized that if he were to survive, he needed to “shut up” and somehow “go away” at the very minimum. He did just that because he had to.

Living as he did in a small town under the rule of unquestioned authority, Glen longed for a way out. It came when he left home for college in the mid-1960s.

The 1960s in America was a time of revolution. It was an era of protests, marches, and discontent with the war in Vietnam. It was an unsettling time of new ideas and challenges. Also, it was a time of new-found freedoms.

Glen left home and stepped into a whole new dimension. For the first time in his life, Glen had total freedom, the ability to do whatever he wanted. It was during this time that Glen learned many new ideas, and found out for himself how vastly different the world can be. It was the first time Glen had been exposed to different races, cultures, political beliefs and religions. Here too came his beginning experiences with alcohol, drugs and the opposite sex. Wow, what a beginning of real life!

Life is filled with twists and turns. It seems the great awakening gradually took its toll on Glen. While in college he recognized that something was wrong. He became depressed and somewhat disoriented. Glen sought help at the college infirmary, and this began a most negative and long-term disaster.

For the next several years Glen’s life was literally on hold. He followed instructions from the medical folks. He took his medications, attended his counseling sessions. Little did he know he was on a merry-go-round that was leading him nowhere. But not only that for Glen; Ben wasn’t aware either that he’d fallen into a trap himself—one of answering to authority with no rebuttal allowed. Both had fallen into traps set by Renee by her need to “help” others through controlling them.

Things went from bad to worse. And now Glen was faced with a multitude of unpleasant situations: inadequate housing, unemployment, alcoholism, apathy form family, and many confusing and conflicting feelings.

Ben and Renee, on the other hand, were doing quite well. Ben’s business wasn’t overly successful, but at least he had a private office, regular meals, and a place of his own. And incidentally, he had Renee. Or was it the other way around?

Renee’s need to help soon surrounded Glen. Once again, Glen had accidentally tripped and stumbled into a trap of which he wasn’t aware. He had fallen into the clutches of a most accommodating helper. A trap very similar to living at home but with much more long-lasting and dangerous consequences.

The years passed slowly. Renee’s help came to Glen in various ways. She helped Glen pay his rent and was gracious enough to speak to him and allow him to visit Ben’s office. Wonderful! She even allowed some of his articles to be published.

Glen had learned many things over time. Unable to adequately defend himself against adversity, Glen reluctantly accepted Renee’s help, but suspected that other vital needs and their satisfaction would have to be relinquished in exchange for Renee’s help. His suspicions were soon to be realized, but this was readily dismissed by Renee due to her power and Glen’s lack of influence.

Glen was sounding an alarm. No one listened. He longed to tell everyone about Renee and what she was doing. He wanted others to know of Renee’s pretentious appearance of goodness and “help” she cultivated, while simultaneously treating Glen as unworthy of respect and not worthy of being treated like a human being. His efforts in this regard fell on deaf ears. No one listened or cared. Still Glen persisted, and tried in every conceivable way to tell others.

During all this, Fate stepped in and brought forth an unexpected event—Renee’s health began to wither. She had liver cancer.

As Renee’s health continued to decline, Glen still held on to his message. The timing of Glen’s message and Renee’s failing health didn’t sit well with others. Once again, Glen was asked to be silent and please, go away!

What was Glen’s message? And why was it so important that he felt he needed to write an essay and make it available to mourners after Renee’s demise? Yes, Renee had passed! But now, what of Glen and his message?

What Glen had to say had been learned over a period spanning greater than twenty years. He had paid a dear price for what he’d learned. He hadn’t known that Renee, due to her influence, was socially isolating Glen. He hadn’t known of the criticism of him behind his back to everyone Renee knew. He hadn’t known about the private conversations that had been held to talk about him. He hadn’t even known how phony and obnoxious “helpers” can be. All this he’d found out the hard way.

Additionally, he hadn’t known that when Renee passed she’d saddled her husband with bills for utilities that had been unpaid for the previous three months. Also, that the bulk of her estate had been left for charity, not her husband, who now had next to nothing. Incidentally, he hadn’t even been aware that Ben, Renee’s husband, now widower, didn’t even know how to drive a car.

Glen certainly knew that Renee’s husband was totally controlled by her. But he didn’t know that when Renee died, she’d left Ben as an infant to walk alone now in the woods. In fact, Ben now felt imposed upon when he had to answer the telephone, a small task formerly managed by Renee.

So much to know about someone trying to help!

Glen’s hard-learned message is clear: Let no one control you! Further, his experiences raise certain moral questions that really need to be answered. For instance, is charity always from the heart, or are there “charitable” people who demand repayment for it in insidious, treacherous ways? Can we have good intentions but, in reality, do harm despite them? Lastly, how can we be sure when someone justifies actions such as these that they were, as they state, “directed by God”?

At first glance, Renee appeared to be the personification of goodness. When she passed, however, she left behind a poor child with nothing, and a man who couldn’t forget what she did. Is this the woman you thought you knew?